Wednesday, January 13, 2010

Just Another Day in A Worker's Paradise

Venezuelans are just now getting an opportunity to try on for size their newfangled and stepped devalued currency. The devaluation is the result of its well-loved dictator for life, Hugo Chavez, trying to micromanage an economy that even by third world standards is too large for central planners to harness with middling success.

The country lies in shambles, unable to help its own citizens due to its incompetence and economic plundering, and unable to secure the assistance from outsiders because the country has reneged too often on its foreign debt obligations, and because it has discouraged outside corporate investment through its wont to nationalize whole industries within the blink of an eye.

Now comes Chavez with two new ideas to help out his lucky workers in paradise.

First is Venezuela's new power rationing program, designed to save electricity in a country that sits atop one of the world's richest energy hot spots. While blackouts are already commonplace in the country's remote south, the new blackouts will affect all Venezuela. Not to worry though, new government advertising will help citizens get used to the three minute shower and will instruct them on how to brush teeth without wasting any water.

Then Hugo got to thinking.

All of the country's necessary inconveniences would be easier to sell to the people if there was a programming pipeline to explain to subjects how gratifying it is for individuals to be able to sacrifice for the good of the collective.


For this, Hugo has had another great idea--to strongly encourage Venezuela's television networks to make soap operas more socialist. To help hasten this enactment he has announced a willingness to lend a hand to the networks, but, I'm sure, no pressure!

Soon 'The Young and the Content' will be jostling for ratings with 'All Hugo's Children' and 'One Life to Live for Everyone Else.'

In the end though, socially minded television watchers will only benefit from the exciting new programming if it takes place in time slots not scheduled for the new rolling blackouts.

A problem for which I'm sure Chavez has a solution.

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